Bleed MeBleed meBleed Me by DareDreemer
Drain the pain from within
As blackness crashes down upon me
Threatening to destroy what's left of me
What was once light is now black
The chains rattle at my wrists
And at my ankles
The bars are cold and unyielding
Will I know freedom ever again?
I shiver and sit in silence
I say again
The quiet is deafening
Trapped in an endless dream
Once there was fresh grass to trod
Now only cold hard ground
Don't let me drown in my tears
Make the hurt end
Let me see the light, I plead
I want to walk beneath the stars
Tears stain my cheek, slithering down
Why am I here?
What is this torture?
I whimper desperately
Take what you came her for...
So that I can live once more
My ApologyOutwardly I always wore a smile,My Apology by DareDreemer
I was pretending that everything was alright and that nothing was wrong.
And though perhaps not everyday was that true,
But most days inside, I was crying, I was no longer strong.
A few close at hand, got a window view.
They saw the truth, the lies that could not hide.
I was fortunate that they could see through the facades.
That they chose to have faith and stood by my side.
They do not know all the tears they wiped away,
Or how they kept me going, when I could barely stand to walk.
All the times they sat up late at night with me, until the dark and dismal morn.
They helped me when no one else could get me to talk.
If only you knew the anguish that has eroded my heart,
The guilt and the feeling of despair.
How I longed to have things back the way they use to be,
To step out side, to breathe and kiss the cool evening air.
I know I have hurt you and left you without any answers.
It wasn't my intention to forget you.
Oh, if only I had seen sooner, w
Cover Art for When the Bell Tower Tolls by the lovey
Please check out her art and show her some love.
To read click the cover
Then just scroll down the list of works until you come to it.
Can also be read at:
Archeive of Our Own (AO3)
Again, just scroll down the list of works until you come to it.
Collab Gift: The Last Hour (Lilith & Alan)
Fanart by: StickieBun13 & UnknownPaws
Loki (Female Clone) = The Avengers
Zombie Survivor = Stuck In Savannah
Grell Sutcliff (Modern) = Kuroshitsuji (Black Butler)
Cheshire Cat (Lingerie) = Alice In Wonderland
Dirndl Grell (Fanart) = Kuroshitsuji (Black Butler)
Planned Future Cosplays:
Grell Sutcliff (R-rated) = Kuroshitsuji Musical II
Grell Sutcliff (Traditional) = Kuroshitsuji
Aqua = KH Birth By Sleep
Alois Trancy = Kuroshitsuji (Black Butler)
Christine Daae = Phantom of The Opera
Injection Fairy Lily = Yu-Gi-Oh Card
Nina Hopkins = Kuroshiutsji
The Green Witch = Kuroshitsuji
Shiemi Moriyama (Kimono) = Blue Exorcist)
I'm a Scorpio who Loves all things Disney. I'm a natural born Preformer. I love photography second to preforming. I dream of one day visiting England, Ireland & Scotland. Music is oxygen to me. I study Dance, Theatre & Opera. I'm obsessed with; Black Butler (Kuroshitsuji), Phantom of the Opera & Kingdom Hearts. I'm from California. My favorite color is green. I'm unique & different. I love being a black sheep, being an individual. I'm like an onion, there are many layers to me. Just when you think you know me, you will discover I'm more than you could have ever imagined.
As far as writing goes, I have been telling stories since before I could read & write. I love movies & books. I have always been heavily inspired by visuals in movies & descriptions in books. I use that to my advantage when I write. I love details & am a stickler for them. My specialty when I write is, dreams & flashbacks. I have a tremendous amount of fun writing them. I have an addiction for fairy tales & draw a lot of inspiration from them. From classics to more modern ideas of fairy tales. In addition to writing Fanfics, I also write poetry. Though for poetry I have to be moved to write it. Poetry is not something that easily comes to me & most times it comes to me when I'm sound asleep. Now days I mainly write Fanfics with one of several RP partners, whom I love dearly & have become my best friends. I will say my weakest point when writing is grammar. It was never my strongest point & I am terrible about run on sentences. I am working on it constantly & studying with the goal of continuously growing as a writer & fine tuning my craft. I hope that you enjoy my page & the up & coming adventures that will eventually be making their way here.
My Besties (online and offline):
Right now I feel hurt, angry, upset, tired, sad, frustrated and a whole slough of other feelings. I am moody and broody. I want someone to talk to and yet I want to be left the fuck alone. Today started off good. I had a few laughs. Then ignorance reared its ugly head. The pile has continued to mount and while I love to write my feelings and my emotions out. It is therapeutic for me. I often find I am afraid to state my feelings on matters, publicly. I should be able to speak my mind without fear of repercussions or judgement. After all those who are not accepting of different ideals and judge you for them, really aren’t people I should be associated with. Yet I continue to hide them.
It does not help that I have parents that do not understand. Do not believe me. And they themselves say ignorant and hurtful things. I honestly try not to do the same to them, but I am human and regardless of how hard I try not to, I often snap back. Sometimes I believe I am part snapping turtle. And it seems the older I get the more frustrated I get.
It gets tiring feeling so much. I wish there was an on and off switch to my emotions. Often they rush from me like a raging water. Nothing violent, but still when I am struck emotionally, it feels like a dam bursts and all of my feelings come pouring out. I feel too much. Everything amplifies and then with one statement a match is lit and an explosion occurs. I literally can be deeply hurt by just one look. One word. I am sensitive. I am passionate. And I am empathetic. The degree to which I feel is over bearing at times.
I have once again been reduced to tears over a reaction. Something ignorant, followed by anger, followed by hurt, followed by shame. It is a roller-coaster I can never seem to get off of. Even now I feel like screaming and hiding at the same time. I cannot stop the tears. Why do I let someone get to me like this? Under my skin, so deeply? Why cannot I stay quite like I do my views to the public? I am frustrated. I am confused. I want to turn off my emotions. I want a break. I want to be numb for a period of time. Not worry. Not fear. Not let anyone get to me. Just be me.